Oct 19, 2008
I'm so tired
Of the election. I think election fatigue is going to become a diagnosable medical disorder one of these days. Here is my lament, and it's not related to a candidate so don't think I'm going to tell you why I'm voting for who I'm voting for here. We picked the wrong way to choose the men who run for President. When Washington was elected, he didn't campaign. The people wanted him, and he acquiesced.
We used to nominate people in a more honest fashion. We looked around for the best and brightest and said, "Him! I want him to lead us!" And then there was an election, and then we had a President. It wasn't an office you prepared your whole life for in the same way that it is now. You spent your whole life living as a good and honest servant, and people responded. They weren't perfect, but no one is. So, despite advances in technology, I'm just wondering, could we go back to the late 1700s? I would still like to be able to vote, though, and wear pants, which could be tricky...
Oct 7, 2008
Good grammar. Who needs it?
Hilarious op-ed piece from the New York Times on Sarah Palin's speech patterns. I know that this kind of negativity isn't exactly productive, but it sure is funny. Because if we can't agree to pick on people who who willfully ignore the conventions of the English language, the communists have won, folks.
That diagram, by the way, is the Preamble to the Consitution.
For the Pledge of Allegiance, head over here.
Oct 3, 2008
Woot.com
STFU Maltin
Maybe it’s Death Race. Maybe it’s Eagle Eye. Maybe Wanted. This year everyone has one pretty lousy action movie that they still very much wanted to see. That’s the dirty little secret of the movie industry. Namely, that the system used by movie reviewers is completely unscientific.
You can throw out “four stars” and “six thumbs” all you want, but what does that mean? There’s really only one measure of thrills and romance, and that’s heart rate. So we’re proposing an new system based on the Prevention DS-2200PV Ultima Upper-Arm Blood Pressure Monitor.
With the ability to measure Systolic, Diastolic and pulse rate, the Prevention DS-2200PV Ultima Upper-Arm Blood Pressure Monitor can finally tell us which is more exciting, the first time Jason leaps out of the bushes in Friday The 13th or when Freddie grows to a hundred feet tall and eats Johnny Depp in Nightmare On Elm Street. The built in memory stores up to sixty readings, so you can poll your friends to find out who is the better leading lady, Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct or Lauren Bacall in To Have And Have Not. And once you get those readings, you can move them via the USB connection to your Windows PC. The Hypertension Data Management System lets you break down the measurements by hour, day, month or year, making sure we can finally have a guide to movies based on real numbers, and not some jerkface who thinks Blade Runner was lousy. I mean, honestly, Leonard Maltin.
With the Prevention DS-2200PV Ultima Upper-Arm Blood Pressure Monitor, you can find that guy who hates the Batman movies and shut him up once and for all. You can even use the irregular heartbeat indicator to see if you’ve got an irregular heartbeat. Good to know before you get in the popcorn line. And having visual cues will really help you understand what changes your blood pressure.
Don’t waste your time trying to explain the complex nature of chaos and order and how they entwine in a unending dance. Pull out some hard figures like a geek should! The Prevention DS-2200PV Ultima Upper-Arm Blood Pressure Monitor is your ticket to winning every movie debate conclusively. What’s better than being right?
